Diagnosis- Don't freak out

The diagnosis has been issued: I have a detached retina. It's bad, but, not the worse case scenario. I have actually been really lucky that I haven't caused more damage the past weeks with all I do! The doc I saw today was fantastic and he and his office worked lightening fast to get me into a retinal specialist immediately. I will be seeing him first thing tomorrow morning. Surgery is very likely and I'll have to take some time off of work to rest and recover. Leo may have to go to a sitter for a bit of that time, it just depends what my prognosis and recovery plan will be.
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I'm a bit dazed at the moment. Ive been calling work, arranging for subs, and all that. Just crazy! While this is stressful it is good news as it is an issue that can be fixed. We just have to take care of it pronto. Thank you everyone for the good thoughts and such. They worked! I'll keep you updated best I can. I'm freaked, but, starting to think positive. Much luv to you all!!

Loosing Sight... Literally

This is one of those entries where I don't know how or where to begin. Forgive me if this entry seems a bit all over the place and long.

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During the nasty blizzard and snow storms we had two weeks ago I noticed something strange going on in the inside of my right eye. It looked like my glasses were somehow 'in the way' like around my nose. I didn't pay much attention at first, but, after a couple of days I took my glasses off and that dark 'spot' was still there. I then thought maybe congestion and pressure were causing this blackish-ness to happen. However, after a few more days and decongestants that dark spot still remained.

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Keep in mind I had no other symptoms going with this, so a trip to the ER didn't seem warranted and I couldn't even get my car out of the bottom of the driveway as the street was covered with snow so high it would've caused problems with my old tank, so, no trip to the doctor. When school began I was so busy getting back into the groove and ready for a weekend of Irish dance competition I put off calling my optometrist.

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The feises were difficult to say the least because of extreme fatigue and my depth perception being so wonky because of this eye thing. I managed good placements, but, not great dancing. In fact, at the second feis last Sunday, I sprained my ankle when I slipped on stage before I went into a turn. I managed to finish,and placed first, but, understandably I had to drop out of the rest of my competitions. I took the following Tuesday off of work due to the swelling in my ankle and since I had a moment to breathe I called my optometrist to arrange an appointment and get some drops or something so I could regain my full field of vision in my right eye.

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Well, no appointment with the eye doc was made. They told me I had to go to an opthamologist as it could be a variety of issues that only an opthamologist could test for. Oh and vision insurance doesn't cover this type of deal, I have to use my medical insurance. Great. Of course, that means I had to go through my PCP to get a referral as I have an HMO. Keep in mind, I am beyond grateful to have insurance! That said, I am beyond over this whole referral approval business. It took my doctors office 24 hours to get my referral approved and that was being listed as an urgent case. The opthamologist wants to do a vision screen as well and that has to get approved. Any tests outside his office will probably have to get approved as well. I hate the thought that finding answers to this problem may drag on and on waiting for approval.

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My PCP believes I have lost about half the vision in my right eye. Nothing looks wrong on the surface which means something funky monkey is going on behind it. It maybe optic nerve damage (bad, bad stuff), it could be a retinal issues, etc. I will need tests, maybe a MRI, and surgery maybe an option. Of course, this all depends on what the opthamologist finds tomorrow.

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To be honest, I'm freaked out. I'm trying very, very hard not to look anything up online and not to obsess over the what ifs going through my brain. The sprained ankle doesn't bother me that much because I KNOW what to do with it. I KNOW the prognosis is good as long I do such and such. I don't know anything about this eye issue and the thought of it being permanent freaks me out. It's hard to type on my phone, stare at comp screens (hence the major slow down in blog posts) for a period of time, music, text in a book, etc. I don't want to live my life not seeing correctly- I get a little nauseated sometimes, pressure headaches, and tired from having to constantly adjust my focus and perception. I just can't imagine going on in this manner. I'm hoping for a diagnosis and solution(s) tomorrow. I just need to know this can be dealt with.

Happy Valentine's Day

Sweet Boys

Just hoping you all had a lovely Valentine's Day. Jon and I celebrated last night with a fantastic four course meal and a great bottle of pinot noir at a local French restaurant. Nothing super fancy in terms of gifts, but, that wonderful meal was all I needed. It really is the simple things in life isn't it?

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Why I Do What I Do

A 90 minute feature documentary about Irish dancers competing in the 2010 World Championships is on the market. It's already going to be shown in the UK and Ireland and there are rumors the rights have been bought to show it in the US and Canada. My fellow dancers and I are practically frothing at the mouth to see this. Why? Because it shows what we do and why we do it. I may never dance on the world stage, but, I dance for the love, the challenge, the hardwork, and those fleeting minutes I'm on stage trying to obtain perfection.

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Jig

Reminder

I got some upsetting news this week, about a loved one. I'm still processing right now which is why I haven't blogged about it yet. Being stuck at home (yes, week two of no school b/c of this record snowfall deal) hasn't helped as I've had more than enough time to overthink the whole deal. But, here's something I've started telling myself to help.

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"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change.

The courage to change the things that I can.

And the wisedom to know the difference."

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Really, really hoping this sinks in. I'll be back soon.

We Don't Do [this much] Snow in Oklahoma

This photo is NOT an exaggeration. The state of Oklahoma has been closed down since the 15-20 inches of snow thanks to Blizzard '11 decided to come through Tuesday. I haven't left the house in three days, AND tomorrow marks the fourth day that school will be canceled. Temperatures have been below 20 degrees, and in the below zero range which is rare for us and is keep the snow and ice around. That said, I'm loving being at home as all creature comforts, cable, food, internet, electricity, haven't been taken away. I am loving being able to get little projects here and there taken care of. It has been nice.

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That said, it hasn't been nice outside the house for many. I have friends who were stranded at work until today when they were 'rescued'. I know other people who had to wait five hours for a tow truck to get to their car that ran off the road. In fact, the state is littered with abandoned cars along the highways and city streets. Many highways are shut down or just barely drivable. Plowing them, and city streets, has been hindered by the absurd number of vehicels littering the roads. Mind you, we don't exactly have a large fleet of snowplow vehicels in the state, I've been told that the city of Tulsa has exactly two of them. So, you can imagine how slow going the clean up efforts have been. There is over a foot of snow on the city street I live on right now, it hasn't been cleared and the only cars able to get through (at a slow pace) are large trucks and heavy duty jeeps. Not even the mailman has delivered the mail.

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That's right, even this blizzard has halted the mail.

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And if things don't sound crazy enough soak in this next photo taken by a friend's husband near their home.

The snowplow is stuck. STUCK! This is along a major street in South Tulsa and he's not going anywhere until the area around him is cleared out. Insanity. Suffice it to say, I'm happy to be warm and safe inside and I plan on staying put until things are safe enough to drive.

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Cause it's the little things like not being injured, or damaging your car, or being stranded that make life that much nicer.

Snowmaggedonmonsterpocolypse- Say That Ten Times Fast

Mina, hypnotized by the snow.

Not but three days ago, on Saturday, Oklahoma tied a record high- it was 75 degrees. Right now it is 12 degrees with blizzard like conditions. Now, folks you must understand Oklahoma is NOT equipped to deal with this kind of weather. It simply isn't. Even with a state of emergency declared there just isn't enough equipment to clear the roads. Most mock this, roll their eyes and such. Though I did live up north I've learned to accept this shortcoming. Usually we have some ice, a bit of snow, and that's it for winter. When we have more than an inch of snow people get weird and crazy. Imagine how it is when there's a prediction of over a foot of snow. Yeah, we just shut down (after going to the grocery and liquor store mind you, necessities to survive being stuck at home).

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Now imagine when a blizzard warning is issued- the third one issued in Tulsa history. Schools shut down BEFORE the snow was even here. Even I canceled a babysitting gig for fear the freezing rain would start while I was babysitting. It did btw, makes me feel better in light of the parent who was annoyed at me for requesting that I stay home and safe.

It's not even 9am here in Tulsa and we are already snow bound. I love it as long as I don't have to drive in it of course. One things that I love about snow storms, or blizzard in this case, is it forces one to just stay inside and slow down. Lordy knows we all need that sometimes, right? The dogs, however, are going cuhrazy playing outside, it's like switch comes on and their brains go into snow mode. Leo hates it that I'm not letting him outside!

But when your back door has already been frozen shut (hairdryers are so handy) I'm going with the play it safe mode. Besides, I have to clean and dry the dogs off and well... yeah I have the day off and I plan on being extra lazy.

Unlike Tibby... who has taken lazy to the cat coma level. So, he wins the lazy contest... for now. ;-)

ps- You better believe more snow survival stories and pictures to come!