Monday, November 9, 2009

What Do You Do?

Life's been a bit distracting lately and, of course, I was going to blog all about it.... then all came to a screeching halt in my head. All it takes is life really handing you a doozy to make you gain some serious perspective on your measely 'distractions'.

I will back up and explain. As I was doing my usual perusual of blog and Facebook updates this morning I saw one of my friends post a picture of her father. I haven't seen her father in 10 years as they live in France [I stayed with the family in high school]. The picture was of her father flying and he looked exactly the same way I remembered him and that being so, I posted a comment on her photo.

About 10 minutes later I recieved a FB message from my friend. She told me that her father had passed away, two weeks ago, of a heart attack and that she and her family were having a hard time. I literally felt a Mack Truck hit me on the inside. I wrote back express my condolences of course, said what I could think of that would be comforting- felt like a complete looser for missing the status messages (no worries I didn't say that to her).

I don't think those words were enough. Though obviously those words were better than nothing. I wish there was more I could do, could say... I would love nothing more than to hop on a plane right now, go to Paris, and give her and her family a hug- cost be damned. Unfortunatly I don't have the cash to spare at the moment (one of those 'distractions' I spoke of earlier) and I have no clue what to do so far away. I am very unfamiliar with French customs when it comes to the loss of a loved one- I'm very familiar with American ones though, cards,

So... what do I do? Or is there anything I can do?


Sarah said...

See if there is a way you can Paypal her some cash to help with funeral or estate expenses, maybe? Or see about sending some flowers? There are companies online that will deliver internationally. Of course, I don't know the cost, but I'm sure it's cheaper than a plane ticket. Bummer... serious bummer... :(

lovelyinlux said...

I'm not an expert, but knowing the French, I think a simple card would be the best. I think they're probably a bit more formal than what you would do in the states. What I would do, however, is write exactly the same thing that you put in your blog...that you would love nothing more than to hop on a plane right now, go to Paris, and give her and her family a big hug. That's such a nice thing to say. I think that's better than any gift you could give- and nothing you could do can take away their pain right now, anyway.
Good luck!

Habebi said...

Sarah and Lovely- Thank you both! Between you guys and a couple of other friends, I've decided to send a card with a handwritten [short] letter in French. Keep it simple, yet, from the heart.

Lovely, you're right, not a whole lot I can do to ease that kind of heartbreak. I can't imagine what they are going through. So sad.

Sarah- This is Capucine's father we're talking about (the French girl who came with me to work at Frankoma the summer of '99 ). He was a very nice, easy to get along with, family man. Six children, a wife, and three grandchildren he left behind. Unbelievable.