Sunday, January 31, 2010

What I'm Getting Myself Into

Alrighty, fair warning, this post contains streams of throught that having been rolling around in my head. I promise pictures of doggies and snow will be back, so, if you would like to skip this post and wait for the puppies I understand.

I have experienced two two hour classes of Irish dance and boy have I become an addict! I've been stranded since Thursday afternoon because the ice and snow are not a happy combo in my big ol' tank of a car. In that time I've worked out and practiced to get more strength and get back in shape quicker. Motivation has come! Not to mention I've been looking up everything I can about Irish dance online.

Now this sounds pretty nerdy I know. I'm the type of person who fixates on something and needs to find all I can about whatever subject I have on my mind. As I've gotten older and hopefully wiser I've learn to try to find a balance, but, balance is challenging when you have so much time to sit around! I have done the laundry, taken care of the dogs, cleaned up the house, so I have been productive in other areas. But, what has been and is on my mind is Irish dance and what I can possibly do with it.

My primary goal is to get moving and find a healthy, fun, and challenging outlet. However, I am actually thinking to myself, "I can do this- and well!" This mentality is not common for me when I start something, it was even worse when I was younger- thank goodness life and experience has tapered the down self-doubt/depreciation somewhat, living that way wasn't fun by any stretch. The fact I am not intimidate by the Irish dance competitions I could attend and levels I could work my way up towards is a big deal for me. I usually stray away from competition as I tend to put way too much pressure on myself. I'm a perfectionist and I have not dealt well with that trait well in the past especially in competitive activities. Over time I stayed away from activities I thought would bring out that overly perfectionist competitor in me. Just didn't seem I could keep a healthy mentality and it was better to keep my distance than try to throw myself into the fire and see how I do.

I guess I've really locked on finding information about Irish dance because of these thoughts and emotions towards not being intimidated by performing and competing. I wanna know as much about it so I can see if this is the 'real deal' for me, so to speak. To be honest, it seems what I'm getting into is fun, challenging and perhaps I can work towards getting over some issues I have with putting too much pressure on myself and all that. I don't want to avoid the competition thing, I'm actually intrigued by it. So I guess I'll work towards learning the steps to this dance form first and perhaps after that dabble into being in a Feiseanna. Guess I'll have to keep at it to see. To sum up I'm really not sure what all of these musings really equate to, but, I'm willing to find out and see where this little activity can lead me to. Worth a try right?

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